Social Skills Curriculum (up to 97+ Lessons!) - Updated 2020

Value-Play     High5-Time

  • Introduction to Value-Play / High5-Time   / Video 

  • Social Video Story: The Secret to Successful Relationships: It's all about the kind of Value that one brings / Video  

        * * * The story, The Secret to Successful Relationships is the basis for Value-Play and is the initial lesson taught and retaught at the beginning of each social skills series.  Click on the link above or see the video here, directly below.  And, feel free to download the printed version of the story:

The Secret to Successful Relationships (Elementary)

The Secret to Successful Relationships (Older Elementary)

1  How to Listen: Listening Position / Updated Video    (prior Video) / How to Listen Lesson

Greeting by using the person’s name (and using the person’s name in general) / Video Greeting-Bye-Name Lesson / Greeting-Bye and Using Name Advanced Lesson / Greeting-Bye-Name Use High-5 / Greeting-Bye-Name Use High-5 w-Value Amount (NEW)

Sharing / Video /Sharing K-2nd Lesson / Sharing-Taking Turns Lesson / Sharing MS-HS Lesson / Sharing MS-HS Hi-5 Lesson

Complimenting / Video Complimenting Younger Elem Lesson Complimenting Elem-Advanced Lesson  / Complimenting MS-HS-Advanced Lesson / Complimenting MS-HS Hi-5 Advanced Lesson

Taking Turns Talking: The 2 Question Rule / Video / 2Q-Rule Lesson / Sample 2Q Rule Questions

Staying on Topic / Video / Staying on Topic Lesson  / Staying on Topic Game

How to Interrupt the right way / Video / How to Interrupt Lesson / Interrupting using Clues Lesson

Starting a Conversation / Video / Starting a Conversation Lesson (see #12 Introudcing Topics of Interest)

Joining a Conversation / Video / Joining a Conversation (Elem-younger) / Joining a Conversation (Elem-MS)

10  Maintaining a Conversation / Updated Video     (prior Video)

11  Ending a Conversation (& Saying Goodbye) / Video / Ending a Conversation-Saying Goodbye Lesson KG-Early Elem Ending a Conversation-Saying Goodbye Lesson - Elem / Ending a Conversation-Saying Goodbye Lesson - MS-HS

12  Introducing Topics of Interest (visible clues) / Video / Finding Social Clues KG-Elem Lesson / Finding Social Clues - Elem Lesson / Finding Social Clues - MS-HS

13  Introducing Topics of Interest (invisible clues) / Video  Remembering Social Clues KG-1st Grade Remembering Social Clues - Elem Lesson Remembering Social Clues - MS-HS

14  Being Silly vs. Being Funny / Video / Silly vs. Funny Lesson - version (A) / Silly vs. Funny Lesson - version (B) / Silly vs. Funny Lesson - version (B) MS-HS / Silly vs. Funny Worksheet 1 / Silly vs. Funny Worksheet 2

15  Introducing Yourself / Video

16  Getting to Know Someone New / Video

17  Three Steps to Compromising / How to Compromise when playing Lesson - Elem

18  Initiating Play / Video / Initiating Play Younger Elem Lesson / Initiating Play Elem-MS Lesson /

19  Joining in on Play / Video / Joining in on Play Elem Lesson / Joining in on Play Older Elem-MS Lesson

20  Ending Play / Video

21  Staying within your Personal Space and out of others / Keeping to your own space-Don’t be a Space Invader Lesson

22  Play Together - Stay Together / Play Together - Stay Together Lesson

23  How to Use Words to Get Your Friend's Attention

24  Being a Friend on the School Bus (NEW-ish) / Riding the School Bus with Friends Lesson

25  How to Win / How to Lose with a Friend / How to Win and Keep a Friend Lesson / How to Lose and Keep a Friend Lesson

26  Introducing a Game of Interest with Invisible Play Clues

27  How to Initiate and Maintain Pretend Play (i.e., recess play) / How to Join in on Pretend Play

28  Playdate Strategies: Using your Friendship Skills when it counts / Playdate-Recess Strategies with Flexible Thinking 

29  (Advanced) How compromising shows your friend how important he/she is

30  (Advanced) Compromising with your friend when it is really, really hard to

31  Offering Help to others

32  Accepting Help from another person

33  Assigning (social) Value to a social exchange

34  How to know when a friendship is “equitable”

35  Real vs. Fake Friend

36 The Circle of Friendships and Acquaintances: Getting along with everyone (The Golden Rule

37  Keeping Calm (and Carrying On)

38  Setting up and Going to Your Calm Place

39  Problem Solving: Finding Solutions

40  Problem Solving:  Balancing the Problem with Solution(s) / Solving a Problem by Balancing with Solution(s) Lesson / Review Balancing the Problem with Solution(s) Lesson

41  Deciding what is a Small to Big Problem / And "No Problem" 

42  Recognizing Feelings (Facial Expressions and Emotional Intent) / Recognizing Feelings Lesson

43  Perspective Taking: How others may be thinking something different than me

44  Perspective Taking: How my behavior affects what others may be thinking or feeling / How my behaviors affect what others may be thinking or feeling Lesson

45  Perspective Taking: Making a Clever vs. Extreme Comment; Review of Funny vs. Silly  

46  Talking to Others when Upset

47  Understanding and Dealing with Anger

48  Cool Thought vs. Hot Thought

49  Don’t let in Mr. Polar Head (rigid thinking) / Polar Thinking Lesson / Option Thinking Lesson / Polar Man vs. Option Man Cards

50  Option Thinking vs. Polar Thinking (flexible over rigid thinking)

51  How t0 block-out or limit noises and distractions (The ability to “Filter”) (NEW)

52 How to avoid getting emotionally overwhelmed by content/information that is very difficult (i.e., slavery, war, poverty, etc.) (Again, the ability to “Filter”) (NEW)

53 Dealing with Making a Mistake (Introduction to Trial & Error(Updated)  Lesson Plan

54  Trying when the Work is Hard (Trial & Error: How the brain works(Updated)

55  Trying Something New (How we learn almost “everything” through Trial & Error; Developing Grit(Updated)

56  Accepting “No” for an Answer

57  Dealing with being Teased and Bullied (and Acts of Aggression) – incl. research findings

58  Dealing with Being Left Out

59  Being Assertive in a Respectful Way

60  Safe vs. Unsafe Behaviors w/ Peers and Adults

61  Good News vs. Bad News (Coping Skill)

62  Let’s Do Something Different – Learning to cope around unexpected changes

63  Social Repair: Saying “I’m sorry” once and then Fixing the mistake

64  Using your Inside Voice – Not talking too loud with your friends

65  The Importance of Telling the Truth when Starting and Joining a Conversation  

66  How Repeating a Question or Comment over and over again can Tire Your Friends Out

67  Eating and Talking (or Talking while Eating) - How to manage both successfully (NEW)

68 When to Tell On Someone…and When not to  

69  Why Friends Keep (certain) Secrets  

70  Avoiding Sensitive Topics (Perspective Taking)

71  Knowing when you are going overboard with what you are saying or doing (Perspective Taking) / Overboard Lesson / Overboard-basic version Lesson 

72  Use of Idioms and Sarcasm within a conversation with your friend 

73  Sarcasm: Friendly vs. Put-down 

74  How to Handle Multiple Conversations that are happening at once  

75  How to Stay Connected with the friend right next to you while staying “connected” with a device in your hand 

76  Review of Social Repair Skills

77  Calling a Friend on the Phone

78  Answering the Phone / Talking with a Friend

79  Texting (Everyone is doing it)

80 Short vs. Long Distance Friendships (NEW)

81 Managaing your online friendships/connections: How many friends do you really need? (NEW)

82 Games of Luck vs. Games of Skill

83  Knowing when to be Cooperative vs. being Competitive

84  Looking for Group Dynamics (Clues) within a new environment 

85 Predicting what Group Dynamics/Clues you might see and being ready (Exec. Functioning)

86  Matching your own behavior with others: Mirroring your own behavior based on what others are doing

87  Time Management Skills (Exec. Functioning)

88  Review: Gaining Positive Attention from your Friends

89  (Advanced) Playdate Strategies: Using your Friendship Skills when it Counts

90  (Advanced) Brining up an Topic of Interest while monitoring your Friend’s Response

91  (Advanced) Complimenting

92  Learning to Delay Gratification (Exec. Functioning / Self-Discipline)  

93  Growing Up: Developing your Time-Line of Social/Emotional Milestones in relation to others (i.e., when do people stop worrying about who is in line first, when do kids begin to walk vs. run to the bus, etc.)  (Perspective Taking

94  Examining your Strengths and Challenges

95  Dealing with your Fears: Harry and the Terrible Whatzit by Dick Gackenback

96  What can we learn from Harry and the Whatzit?

97  Social Sequencing: How earlier social behaviors lead to a variety of (predictable) social outcomes (NEW-ish)

Including and in addition to the above lessons, there are an increasing number of specialized content areas that may or may not necessarily be related to social development.  The following are lessons that are either included within the larger curriculum or can be taught separately (i.e., within a mini-series of 3-5 individual or group sessions).

  • Note Taking (an Executive Functioning Task)
  • Impulsive urges - Knowing how impulsivity works and getting a handle on it
  • Transitioning to 3rd Grade (How Recess and Lunch tend to evolve beyond K-2nd Grade)
  • Using Conversation Builder (app) within Value Giving and Taking examples
  • Managing your online friendships/connections
  • Learning to be Safe with peers and adults (avoiding being fooled or set-up)
  • How to block-out or limit noises and distractions (The ability to “Filter”)
  • Related to the above: How to avoid getting emotionally overwhelmed by content/information that is very difficult (i.e., slavery, war, poverty, etc.) (Again, the ability to “Filter”)
  • Learning about Delay of Gratification and Making Better Choices
  • Building up perseverance or “Grit” when things become difficult - an extended series of lessons on how we learn almost everything through Trial & Error

****And rubato app and rubato+ app   are finally here and available on the apple app store for iPhone and iPad.  Real-time, time management!  

a2a logo + now available3

Real-time, time management!  A teaching and learning tool for Executive Functioning as it relates to time management, prioritizing, and delay of gratification.  Check out the how-to demo video and benenfits of the app:

rubato+ app  And with “rubato+” you can program multiple hours, link consecutive hours together, and create folders to save all your clocks, “+"  plenty of other neat features.

*A few sections of the above curriculum are loosely based on the work of Dr. Jed Baker ( ( though the overall teaching approach and resulting lessons are developed with pinciples supported witin Applied Behavior Analysis and often tap into other online resources that are available to the public.


© PositveFamilyBehavior, LLC 2012-2020     © Todd T. Kellogg, LMFT, BCBA 2012-2020